fun · holidays · laughter · self-care

The Joy of Flailing.

So, here I sit at my last desk shift at the gym for a while. I gave my “two week’s notice” to them last week, when I realized that a) I wasn’t taking advantage of my free classes, and b) … I want my Friday mornings back. I am on deck as a “sub” person, and I also said that once school starts again and I have a more regular schedule that I’ll be back fora regular shift. 
The instructor I’ve been working in tandem with for the last 6 months or so just brought me a pastry and a sad face 🙂 she’s so sweet. As we have an early morning shift, no one is usually here too soon before class, so she and I get to talk dating, men, life, etc. She said she just ordered the Calling In the One book. Ha! You never know what happens with these ripples. 
But, I am looking forward to not having to scramble to cover my shift, trade my shift, cover other peoples – cuz obviously I’m feeling a little “put upon” by this – which again tells me that I’ve spread myself too thin – because actually this thing is pretty rad – the classes are great and I’ve realized I like the community aspect of working out. It helps that almost all of the women are older than me, some over 60, and are holding these poses and positions better than I am! It helps to keep me motivated. 
So, I’ll come back as soon as I can, but I need the time off. 
After my shift here, I’m getting picked up to babysit for a family up in the Oakland Hills. Although I’m a little nervous to have the two girls for the entire day (I’ve only sat for them at night – which looks like play, dinner, play, bedtime – so there’s not too much need to be entertaining) – but I’m sure it’ll be fine. i’m actually looking forward to it a little bit. I love the energy of kids. I’m such a kid myself – I love to be silly and nonsensical. Kids love that stuff – morelike,when you say something like, “You guys are monkeys,”  they love to be like “Noooooo, We’re not monkeys!!!” Seems like a silly thing to get indignant about, but when I was teaching a class of kindergartners in South Korea, the thing they most loved to respond with was, “Teacher, we not monkeys!!! You a monkey!!” ~ Their English was a little better at the end of the year 😉 But I love that. I love that kids play along, are silly, and when you make up Surrealist shit, they’re totally on board. 
I’ll babysit for them also next Monday, then the rest of the week with the interior design firm … and then, release. The week between Christmas and New Year’s is entirely mine. 
On Sunday, I’m intending to go ice skating in Union Square. Strange though it may seem “ice skating” is one of the items of my list of “Forbidden Joys” that I wrote 3 years ago through the Artist’s Way. Not that *that* should be such a big deal! But it is. It’s not like I’m good by any stretch – and I’m not being modest. I’m one of those arm-waving flailing people you don’t want to skate anywhere near, because there is a strong likelihood that I will accidentally careen into you and grab onto your scarf for balance and take you down with me …. This actually did happen last time I went skating about 3 or 4 years ago – IT WAS GREAT!!! hahaha!!! I loved it. I didn’t actually take the guy down – but it was close. And we all laughed, and by the end of an hour or so, I wasn’t flailing as much. 
I ski much the same way, and I love that too. The joy of being a beginner, of not caring that I’m not graceful or skilled. Of just the joy of moving continuously around in a circle to the mash up beats of Katy Perry songs. 😉 I love touching base with that kid. So, as part of my “restorative rest” goal of this break, I will be going ice skating. There’s a party at the same time on Sunday that I just found out about, so I’m weighing my options, but I really want to skate. By myself, if other people want to show up, great, I’ll put it out to some friends, but it really doesn’t matter. I end up on my own with my novice-ness anyway. 
I also want to go see some live music. I’ll look up what’s happening at Yoshi’s – the jazz & blues club in the city – there’s one in Oakland, and find out from my musician friends what sort of shows our friends may be playing. I might take my friend up on the “stay-cation” and stay at her apartment in SF during that week off. I might choose to stay in Oakland and follow-up on my intention of hanging out with people more here. 
Those are the two things I know I will do. Music and ice-skating. Ways that get me in my body, out of my head, and into the joy of life. 

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