Halfway to Health

As of noon today, I am halfway through my chemotherapy
As in, I completed 3 of the 6 doses that make up Round 3, and Round
3 is halfway to the total of 5 I will have. 10 weeks, it’s been since I was diagnosed with Leukemia, and
I guess the total of the 20 weeks of my life for a life is not so bad. But, I’m tired today, from the cumulative
effects of it all.
This morning I was writing my morning pages, and just as I wrote
that I was feeling kind of off today, just then, I got a phone call from a
woman I know who’d had cancer and wanted to know if she could drop off some
cancer-fighting affirmation CDs someone had given to her during treatment. At
the exact same time that I was on the phone with her, I got a text from another
friend saying that she wanted to cover the remaining cost of the women’s new
year’s retreat I’ve gone on for the past 4 years. … And that her mother-in-law, a 4-time
cancer survivor, wanted to donate funds to my holiday wish list as well.
Talk about timing.
A friend texted me a few weeks ago, and in her great
empathy, she said that she wished she had a magic power that could make all
this go away. I replied that she does have a magic power: “The same power that saved Harry Potter’s life
over and over again – Love.”
Cheesy and hokey as my reply to her was (and knowing it was
just a good line) 😉 I do believe that to be true. That love can heal; that love
can save.
Sometimes, as we all know, “love” is not enough. It doesn’t
change the person you want to change in the ways you want them to change. It’s
not enough to bridge gaps between lovers that have value mismatches. Love isn’t
always enough to make everything alright … But it doesn’t hurt, does it?
Well, except in that song, “Love Hurts”…
Today, this halfway mark, is a nondescript day with rain
lightly falling and a grey view of the construction site out my window. It’s a
worker-bee kind of day, doing what it’s supposed to be doing, without much pomp
or circumstance. But, it has been dotted by these moments of care and love – a
friend with a coffee; one with a bowl of soup; another, a new book and hat; still others, a donation.
I’ve been trying to actively catalogue these gifts of human kindness as shows of Universal love and kindness, and so I’ve sort of begun keeping
a list of all these things. The list is already very, very long.
(And that’s it for my, “I’m tired, but I wanted to stamp the
occasion and check in with you” blog. Thank you for reading – I hope your reading material picks up
from here) 😉

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